Nhfearme
2/11/01
The Wounded
IC:
John lands the prowler at the house in the grove, still wary of Peacekeeper patrols. He runs up the stairs and enters the
house looking for Chiana. He enters the bedroom. She is waiting for him there. She smiles. John is greatly relieved to see
her well. He sits on the bed and takes her hand.
"You scared the hell out of me Chiana." His face is still damp from his tears. He can't hide the fact of what he just came
from. His anger shows through.
"What's wrong? What happened?" Chiana asks. "Mokan! Is she alright?"
"Mokan." John says. "Has done something that places our lives at risk." He says softly. Not knowing what to say to her.
"What did she do?" Chiana asks, looking deep into his eyes.
"She has Shelan aboard Moya." He answers, looking at their hands.
Chiana's lips part. "Shelan." She gasps. "Why?" She asks.
"She couldn't tell me. The last thing she said before she passed out was Zareth. What does it mean?"
"Captain Zareth. He is the Captain of the Raith. The one who tortured her, before I found her." Chiana answers.
"Torture. Shelan was being tortured. She said she still considers him a friend." John shakes his head and lets out a heavy
sigh. "I tried to tell D'Argo not to trust him." He looks at Chiana's eyes before he tells her. "I had him in my sites. D'Argo
saved him."
Chiana gasps. She looks into his eyes, then at their hands. "When are you going back?" She knows his plan before she asks
it. She knows that John will kill him.
"As soon as it's safe for you and Jake." He looks up at the ceiling then down at her. He fights his tears. "I have to do
this. Scorpius may look for me, but Shelan knows everything about me, you. He knows how to hurt us in ways that Scorpius"
He doesn't finish but sighs and closes his eyes tightly. He swallows and looks at her studying her eyes. "You understand,
right?"
"I understand." She swallows. But something deep in her soul wants to defend him. It doesn't feel right. Not at all.
Rather stands in the bedroom arch. "John and Chiana." He says. "The Peacekeeper patrol will be here in 1000 Microts."
"Come on. We can't stay here." John says and stands.
Chiana goes with John. But she is still stunned by the change in him.
***********************
I want to pour my soul out to your eyes.
But I don't know you anymore.
You would murder a prisoner?
You would murder him?
What is it I see in you now?
Scorpius tortured him.
Is that not enough?
Who did he kill that you would kill him?
I fear your jealousy.
****************
John lands Mokan's stealth prowler in her trades ship landing bay. It isn't a happy return. He can feel it. Something has
changed. He helps Chiana down from the prowler and walks with her. It doesn't feel the same. Something separates them, something
making the time feel awkward and sullen.
John walks to the galley and places Chiana's berry juice in the refrigeration unit. She stands behind him and finally sits
at the table. She seems to play with an invisible object there, thinking. John turns to her.
"What is it?" John says, concerned. She seems to be avoiding his eyes. "Did something happen?"
"Yes." She says with a sigh. "You've changed. Your time on the Command Carrier." She finally looks up at him. "My John
would never kill an unarmed man. A prisoner." She looks at her hand again. "I understood when you saw his memories from the
chair, but this. This is different."
"Is it wrong to defend you?" John says defensively. "Is it wrong to protect our life together?" He huffs, not understanding
her problem with it.
"Tell me this, John. Was he walking around free on Moya?" She asks already knowing the answer. "Or was he locked up. In
one of the cells."
John puts his hands on his hips. He bites his lip and rolls his eyes. He sighs deeply and looks at her. "He was locked
up, but that doesn't change the fact that he raped you." He turns from her angry that she doesn't understand.
"Maybe, when he isn't locked up, you can challenge him." She says softly. Sadness accents her words. "I can't see you shooting
him in a cell. It isn't like you."
John's hand goes to his head. It hurts his head to think of it. His stomach is in a knot. Every muscle is tensed for battle.
The pain in his mind is like grief only he is alone. He doesn't have her support anymore for the crime committed against her.
There is a barren feeling. A promise broken. He feels abandoned by her.
"It makes me crazy Chiana." He tries to explain. "He hurt you! He hurt us. I would think you would be the one to kill him!
You want him to live?" He waits, hinging his life on her next word.
"No." Chiana breathes. "I didn't say that." She glances at him, her eyes filled with tears that refuse to fall. She trembles
at her loss of him, her Johnny. "What I said is if you want to kill him." There is a lump in her throat. She swallows. "Shooting
him in a cage isn't the way."
John remembers his panicked search for her when she was in his clutches. "I looked for you and he had you all that time.
He used you. You could have died!" he begins to cry from the pain of losing something precious. Their first days together
taken, her life used like the slaves of the region. "I just can't except it. I will never understand why you." He looks at
her for an answer to his pain. "When you stabbed him, you could have killed him then. Why didn't you?" He has a deep ache
in the pit of his stomach waiting.
"He didn't kill me, John. Is it worth killing him for?" She says it but somehow it doesn't get at the root. She is afraid
to say what she really feels. Her baby, Shelan may be the father. She fears killing the man who has blessed her. The child
would be John's. She can feel his eyes on her. She is afraid to look up. Afraid he knows her true thoughts. The words she
wishes to say stick in her throat but her mind is screaming. "I won't kill the father of my baby!"
Tears stream down her face that she would protect such a man. Phillip is the Peacekeeper who tried to destroy them both.
In this moment he has succeeded. Chiana is suddenly ashamed of not trusting John. She takes a long and ragged breath trying
to live again. The long silence cuts life from both of them, it cuts their love. Their hearts beat in lonely silence.
"I'm sorry John. I trust you." She swallows. "Do what you have to do." She says it. But she doesn't believe it. Her heart
is breaking that the next time John sees Phillip one of them will die.
John is angry. He turns and sees the pain in her eyes. It shows him he's made a mistake. He doesn't want to make another.
John can now see that his vengeance toward Shelan has done more damage than Shelan's act of violence, his schemes, his spy
and her poison, his attacks. John feels his heart stop when he looks at Chiana and sees the fire has gone out of her eyes.
John feels closer to loosing Chiana than ever.
He goes to her and kneels by her side. He softly takes her hand. Her tears come in a constant stream down two simple channels
on her cheeks. She hasn't moved the entire time they have talked. He can see now that she has been grieving. Someone she held
precious has died. Her grief for who he was before he left down the wormhole with Aeryn.
John sits quietly watching her. The idea of losing her if he kills Shelan makes his blood run cold. He knows if he doesn't
let Shelan go, he will lose her to her grieving. "I'm still here." He finally says. "I am here and I'm yours." He swallows.
"I promise to you that as long as he is a prisoner, I won't try to kill him."
Chiana takes a shallow breath and closes her eyes. She grips John's hand and wipes her eyes. When she opens her eyes she
searches his face, looks into his eyes searching for her lost love and sees him there. She reaches down and hugs his neck.
"Oh, John." She cries, gripping tightly to his shirt. "I really thought I lost you."
"Awww!" He drawls. "You can't get rid of me that easy." He smiles, enjoying her hug.
**************************
ChianaGray
2/11/01
The Wounded
IC:
Where did I loose the connection?
Afraid of you, afraid of me
Slinking in the shadows
Along the edge
Stealing
a touch
A look
Attracted to the fire.
When did I leave this?
Was it ever something
That could be mine?
What
are you doing
Beyond these twilights I roam?
Dare I bold closer
To chance your strike
Bitter word
I'd like to reach
And touch
Dare I say
Ever one word
To chance
I could dance with you
Know
What it's like
Beyond the shadows
Of
my hiding.
What are those things
You are doing over there?
What is that smell?
What is that sound?
Taste
Touch
I
can feel the drum
And the fire
My spirit
Journeys...
Home?
*************************
Nhfearme
2/11/01
The Wounded
IC:
D'Argo stands by Mokan as Zhaan treats her.
Zhaan has run her last scan. "Her ribs are realigned D'Argo. There is no danger in moving her now."
D'Argo lifts Mokan from the table in the maintenance bay and carries her to quarters he has prepared. As he carries her,
she opens her eyes dreamily.
"Krestan." She says looking at him. She places her arms around his neck and hugs him. "The priestess has not yet performed
the rite. We cannot go off this way." She giggles.
D'Argo looks at her.
"Tell me again Krestan why you love me. I never tire of it." Mokan fondles one of D'Argo's tanks, smiling into his eyes.
D'Argo closes his eyes with pleasure at her touch. He opens his mouth to correct her but finds himself tongue-tied.
"Why do you not speak to me Krestan? You know that I live to hear your voice." She says sweetly to him.
He reaches her quarters and places her on the bed.
Mokan holds tightly to him, not allowing him to stand. "Please, kiss me one last time before you leave me?" She says and
pulls him close, kissing him.
D'Argo fights it at first, then gives in to the pleasure and beauty of their first kiss. As she releases him, he gasps.
Mokan reaches to him and takes his hand. "Thank you for walking me home sweet Krestan. It is too long to our festival.
Good night my love." She says and closes her eyes.
He opens his mouth to speak and nothing comes out. He stands watching her sleep. He smiles. Finally he leaves her, walking
out backwards with his eyes always on her.
********************
John and Chiana walk to her bedroom and lie on the bed. They are still a bit nervous from their conversation in the galley.
They lie on top of the bed in their clothes and sleep holding eachother.
********************
D'Argo walks back to the maintenance bay. Zhaan is still there putting away her equipment. She wipes up Mokan's blood from
the table.
D'Argo stands watching her briefly. "The drug. How long will it effect her?"
"It is just a sedative D'Argo. A little something so she will rest and not attack anyone." She tilts her head slightly
with a bit of a smirk.
"But how long will it effect her?"
"Another 5 arns." Zhaan answers looking up at him.
"Thank you." He says and walks out of the maintenance bay.
**********************
DeSaintPhalle
2/11/01
The Wounded
IC:
John snuggles in closer to Chiana, the squeak of his leathers against hers arousing him from slumber. He watches her, lovingly,
in the darkness of the room.
The physical desire to touch her overwhelms him, but he climbs out of bed instead, careful
not to wake her. He wants to take just this moment to consider the truth of her words from earlier.
Brushing his hand across his face, he struggles to remember the person he had been, the person she truly loves. The soul
of that guy had been beaten, tortured,
poisoned, and victimized into a pistol toting, tough swaggering, quick tempered
outlaw of the UT's. "Damn, all I need now is a black stetson and silver spurs."
He wryly snickered at the irony. "I'll
have to talk to Setig about that."
He needed to convince Chiana that his evolution was necessary in order to stay alive, more importantly, to keep his son
from harm. Not to mention the
unborn child. Looking deep into his heart, he knew they were never gonna have a smooth ride
to a happily ever after.
Noticing the temperature around her had become significantly cooler, Chiana stirred uncomfortably. "John?"
"Yeah darlin."
She turned toward his voice, straining to see him. "Come back to bed. I can't sleep without you."
He walked closer to the bed, searching her face for any vestiges of their earlier trouble. "Sleep?" He pulled off his vest
suggestively. "We can do plenty of that once we're dead." He winked at her, then caressed
her cheek. "C'mon, I've got something
in mind that requires a lot more active energy."
*************************
Nhfearme
2/12/01
Alternative Sex
IC:
They lay in her bed. Chiana runs her hands over John's T-shirt. He kisses her. She pulls off his T-shirt. They passionately
kiss and hold eachother.
Chiana runs her hands over John's chest and around his back. John touches her face, her neck. Chiana moves her hand to
unfasten his pants. He takes her hand and places it around to his back.
Chiana reaches again for his pants fastener, trying again to unfasten his pants. Again he stops her and moves her hand.
This time to his chest and holds it.
Chiana stops the kiss. "I want you John." She says nearly breathless.
"Are you sure it's ok to? The last time I was so afraid I would lose you." He says holding her to him.
"The doctor said as long as I drink the juice I won't have a problem."
"I dunno. I don't want to hurt the baby." John says looking at her eyes.
Chiana looks away. "I don't think you hurt me before."
"Are you sure? I don't want to take a chance."
"We can go back to the Doctor tomorrow and ask him. Will that be enough to convince you?"
"That would make me feel better."
John's breath is on her face. His voice resonates through her. It feels so good to her. His hands are so strong. It is
hard to keep her hands off him. She sighs deeply.
"We could do it another way. We have before." She says hopefully.
"Ok." He smiles impishly at her. "As long as we don't do, that." He puts his head to hers, looking into her eyes.
"Oh yeah!" She breathes seductively. "There's plenty else we can do." She laughs.
John laughs with her and lies on his back, finally letting her unfasten his pants.
"Ahhh!" He says with a sigh as she does.
**************************
DeSaintPhalle
2/12/01
The Wounded
IC:
Meanwhile, aboard Moya, D'argo kept a silent vigel near Mokan.
He recognized her brand of pain, and felt helpless to know what, if anything to do about it. It was not unlike that which
he had experienced all these cycles since Lolaan's death. He kept the joy of her memory, and the pain of of her death close
to his heart, not sharing with anyone until the pain was too unbearable to remain contained. He knew Mokan would not have
consciously revealed such intimate
details about herself to him either.
It was not their way. Still he was curious to know
about her past, and her people. In her, he saw
himself reflected.
~~~~~~~~~~
Chiana drew lazy circles on John's chest, pinching
his tender nipples every now and again. "John..."
She drawled
in a most breathy way.
"Hmmm?" He grasped her hand, kissing the inside
of her wrist.
"I've been meaning to give you something for awhile
now." She scrambled out of bed, as Crichton reluctantly
released
her from his arms.
Chiana tossed scarves, and other items aside, as she
searched the dresser, then the frame of the mirror.
Climbing
back into bed, she held out an 18inch velvet
cord attached to a silver cylinder container, the lid
decorated with two
sapphires.
"What is it?" John placed both hands on her waist, pulling
her closer to him.
"Hope." She allowed him to lift her onto his lap.
She leaned forward, placing it over his head.
"Look inside, whenever
you need to find yourself.
It's all you'll need, to remember."
He pulled out a scroll inscribed with a special
Nebari prayer of love, and his puzzle ring.
His eyes searched hers,
emotion clouding his
vision. "But how?"
She smoothed his eyebrow, then stroked the rim
of his ear with her tongue. "I made it into a
talisman, knowing I
would find you one day.
I've had it for six cycles."
She sat upon him, more naked than ever before.
"I've loved you for far longer than that."
*************************
